Crazy2... The day before yest, i was staying up the whole night duin mah work. Well, not all but i tried as much as i cud . On friday, i was all in mood to get things on track by taking a step to skool and mit Curly DADA...Ok, she seems pissed wit me coz i didnt make any appointment. yadayada.. and wen she saw de rate i was duin she was even more pissed. My heart shattered fer the fact that i noe it was the best. I felt like i suck big time. HOPELESS that is. I cant rely on anyone. I have my emotional friends who never stop encouraging me and stuff but as in work... None can help. I min i cant depend on anyone. No one on any part gave ideas or wad... They oni start suggestin wen they see me pissed or reli sad... I dun wan help by symphathy.Im strong but im weak and im weak to be strong enough. contradicting soul tat is. I dunoe. Jwel, eversince i loose u. Im becoming more daring to not dare. I dare not to care of whats goin to happen. I feel hopeless. I alwaes feel that maybe sometimes i nid to be daring enough to feel HURT. to feel PAIN. to take as step THOUGH CONSEQUENCES BE BAD. This is one of those moment, i feel that wad i did on 26marchie2007, was the right thing ever. i din felt like it was a mistake. In fact the courage to do it is at the Peak. Jwelz, i dunoe if im angry iwt you now or i even shud to start of with. Its not your fault, i noe NOR I can ever blame God fer his greatness and the fate He plan fer us. There is a reason for everything. I noe. I used to be a very strong girl. You noe that, You noe wad my frens told me and i have frens in the past who still adore me and make me their idol of strength. I feel bad if i start loosing them. Selfish arent i? IM alwaes der for my frens. I feel happy and good to feel wanted wenever im der fer someone. I often sacifise my feelings for others coz a difference in others makes a great difference in mine. Now, im hopeless. I feel like im dependable. I cudnt be there for them.They dont even let me help dem. They are nice not to trouble meh,by declinING I feel even uselesss. Like now.... i dunoe. I dun wana loose it. I really do miss you and you have been my strength.Overcoming your lost was a huge step. I started laughing the next dae in skooL and i still have my silly jokes to ppl im wit, But everynight and lonely journey home, those were just a contradiction. My feeling is just the weather season now.. One momemnt sunshine, next moment, it rains. You see sun in grey heavy clouds. and sunshine during rainfall. Ouhwell. Life.

BTW. Ro did this fer the concert the other time. Only manage to get it here now. Well, simple but i kinda love it . LOVELOVE RO.... Theres the first release too.. HAHAHA.. OMG! can you believe taht dream come true? I cant, it like far beyond dream to dream of. Seemingly small, but stilll... Yea Dream came true.

( BEFORE STOCK LAST. HEE)

THE NIGHT. OUR NIGHT. MY NIGHT.